80% of couples that I see rarely have sex.
Often many weeks or months go by for both parties and they haven't even touched each-other.
They only masturbate in secret - when they are sure the other won't find out. They feel sexually frustrated and like a desert inside, craving touch and the thrill of having deeply fulfilling sex again.
They have reached a point where they don't even know how to get close again. Having sex feels impossible.
Isolated, they can even start thinking about having an affair as conversations about sex result in fights.
They believe that the desire for sex should arrive naturally and that the other person is to blame for not having enough sex anymore.
Thoughts float through their mind like
"if she/he would touch me differently, I wouldn’t say no all the time."
"if she/he were different I would want to have the desire for sex again."
I won't lie...
This situation is complex.
It has many aspects to it.
But, it can be reversed. I've seen even the most disconnected couples re-kindle their flames and re-create a juicy sex life.
One of the approaches I have in coaching couples goes like this:
We start by digging deep and getting to the core of the obstacles that show up in one's love life. I'm good at asking the right questions, so this tends to go smoother than people think 🙂
After this is identified, I work with my clients to create a communication culture where talking about their needs, desires, and fears is natural, which creates more intimacy.
Often times, by simply opening dialogue, intimacy begins to happen on its own. Other times, it does require more work and we explore ways in which partners can begin to reconnect in a way that is pleasurable, safe, and respects both parties.
From this approach, I have seen many couples get turned on again.
They don't need to go out and have affairs or masturbate in secret. They can replace the emptiness with juiciness which overflows into the other ways they both show up in life.
Ready to re-ignite your love life?
Then book a session with me and get back to a fulfilling and juicy love life.